Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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