Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize