I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
