Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Randomize
