Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
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