i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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