Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Randomize