Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
