Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
