Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
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He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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