she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
