I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
