great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Every concussion has its silver lining
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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