Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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