It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
God, I missed his penis.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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