We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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