Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I want a musical about memes.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize