her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Randomize
