We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
