dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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