So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
