She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
