He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
