You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
