hotel room ftw
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
