I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
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i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
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We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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