I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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