So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
