You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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