i just google imaged poop.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
