Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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