this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize