i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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