i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
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