I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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