I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
