well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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