i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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