sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
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