Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize