Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
