Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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