does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
