Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
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ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
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They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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