i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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