I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
