I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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