Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
