it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
