then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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