I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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